Damaged Goods

It’s been a little over two years since I’ve had someone to call my own. Time has slowly been able to mend the wounds for the most part. The pain is gone, but the scars still remain.

crushed-moving-boxA lot has happened during the transition. I’m temporarily back home while I clear my debts, but thankfully have a stable job in this economy. More importantly, I’ve come back to my Lord and Savior and have given up on several of the chains that were enslaving me. The repairs upon the damage received from my recent struggles are nearly complete, aside from a few areas which will be long term investments. As I sit waiting on these finishing touches, I can’t help but look upon the conveyor belt that lay ahead of me. A factory refurbished product, soon to be shrink-wrapped and packaged for potential resale.

Continue reading “Damaged Goods”

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The Good Book: Reunited and it feels so good

After the longest time being lost in limbo, my daughter was able to uncover my Bible from the depths of chaos that is their toy room. I was so glad to hear the news of her discovery as I’ve been wanting to read His Word in physical form rather than on my phone / PC / tablet. I mean, sure, the digital form definitely has advantages with regards to quick searching and note taking, but aside from the Nook, it’s easier on the eyes than reading on the computer or the iPhone, though the font-size is much smaller than I remember. Honestly, it’s just nice to have the good book back in hand. That and it has some sentimental value as it is my first and only physical Bible (other than a pocket Gideon that I’m sure is laying around somewhere). Continue reading “The Good Book: Reunited and it feels so good”

Avert Thine Eyes

"Don't look! Keep your eyes shut!"
“Don’t look! Keep your eyes shut!”

As a child, I would say I was relatively shy. I pretty much kept quiet and only engaged in conversations when others initiated the interactions. I didn’t go out of my way to talk to people about things until I had prior talks with that person. I could probably say that this was the case even with my own family. I got along fine with my cousins, but when it came to aunts, uncles, and grandparents, I still felt a bit uneasy.

I don’t know if this is necessarily a cultural thing, but Continue reading “Avert Thine Eyes”

“flipocrisy presents Anime-niacs” (or “just another anime post”)

Anime-niacs
reference: Animaniacs –LINK (Hmm, I have absolutely no recollection of this having that lengthier title. This image started as a simple MS Paint work, but I just had to throw in the eyes.)

I know that there are several great and entertaining television shows out there in TV land. I’ve followed my share of television series in the not so distant past, and I know there are a ton of shows just out there waiting for consumption. I did catch a few recently like Game of Thrones and The Walking Dead. I know they’re good and I hear nothing but praise about them through overheard conversations. However, for some reason, I just can’t seem to find the time of day to sit myself down in front of the TV to watch them. Even in this day and age of DVR, On Demand, and Hulu, I STILL can’t get myself to sit and watch them. I don’t quite understand what holds me back from doing so. I do have free time, but I just don’t really spend it in that way. Nor do I feel any inclination to do so.

And yet for some reason, Continue reading ““flipocrisy presents Anime-niacs” (or “just another anime post”)”

Into the Waters: My Testimony

On January 27th, 2013, I was baptized at Community Bible Church in Vallejo, California during evening service. I had the opportunity to give a very brief testimony on God’s holiness, faithfulness and patience, on the trials that I went through in my life, and how God used those trials to bring me back to Him and bring glory unto His name.

I present my testimony in full here for whomever may read it. To God be the glory.


My life is quite a work in progress. Many areas of it lay cordoned off with yellow tape and are either under construction or left abandoned. It’s like watching a shopping center slowly go out of business.

I wasn’t able to get that Bachelor’s Degree from the school(s) I attended.

I never did bother to continue pursuing those various computer certifications I said I was going to try for.

I haven’t been able to stick to the exercise and diet plans I had laid out.

I haven’t been consistent in my studies. I fail to be consistent in my Japanese language study and I haven’t even picked up that programming book ever since I bought it.

I can probably go on, but the bottom line is my life is full of shortcomings and failures. For this, I have no one to blame for but myself. It’s kind of funny and sad because I distinctly remember a middle school project I had where I was asked what would be written on my epitaph. In my inability to think of anything good, I wrote something along the lines that I “finished what I started” or “got the job done” or something lame like that. In looking back, I don’t see any event or accomplishment in my life that would attest to that.

I truly am a flawed creature. Yes, everyone has their own flaws as nobody is perfect, but I often felt that I got the shorter end of the stick in this lottery called life.

There was nothing in my life that I could brag or boast about. I wallowed in self-pity and self-doubt and selfishness and escapism. I felt inadequate and I felt that particular quality couldn’t be changed.

And why should I even try to? It’s all meaningless, anyway. “Vanity of vanities! All is vanity”. (Ecc. 1:2)

I ran from my responsibilities. I ran from my pursuits. Most importantly, I ran from God.

As I am, who would embrace one so sad, wretched, and pitiful? Who would accept one so wicked, depraved, and corrupt? Who would seek after one who ran from Him, who hated and despised Him, who turned away to pursue selfish desires, and didn’t want anything to do with Him?

There is One. Continue reading “Into the Waters: My Testimony”

Spread too Thin

While sitting around staring at my disconnected Intuos, I couldn’t help but notice something. With most things that I do, I’m somewhat like spreading jam on bread. It’s hard to get an even spread, and the chunks of jam often clump up in spots. I have several interests and hobbies, and I guess I could relate to the saying “jack of all trades, master of none.” For example, I think I do pretty well as a tech guy. I have a fairly broad knowledge of things hardware and software, but I can’t say that excel at any one aspect of it. I suppose I’m okay as an artist, but I got a long way to go considering my lack of artistic foundation. I suppose I have some capacity for singing and music (used to sing in choir, an r&b group, play some guitar and dabbling in bass) but I’m not all that. Definitely not recording material and not a stranger to haters on YouTube lol.

In most aspects of my life, I Continue reading “Spread too Thin”

AWOL

Wow, it’s been a long time since my last post. Sorry to leave any readers I had hanging for so long. I’ve been around and just now realized something I overlooked. Comments were disabled on several of my most recent posts. I have no idea how many hits I was even getting because of this and my readers couldn’t even leave any feedback and critique. Pretty much sucks cuz the last posts were already around a year old.

Sorry that I’ve neglected you, Ritsu and Mugi. You’re both long overdue for your Death Devil drawings. Sorry Yui/LiSA for not covering “Ichiban no Takaramono” like I was supposed to. I just hate barring that first fret on the guitar I have. Sounds so muffled :/

There’s been a lot going on with me personally in the last year and let’s just say there’s been some life-changing events. My current situation has impacted my creative productiveness quite a bit. I put down fansubbing for the time being and haven’t really worked on anything for quite some time. I’ve pretty much been wallowing in a mixture of searching job boards and video gaming as an escape from my reality.

There should be things coming on the horizon. I’ll probably post the missing works I put up on dA as well as a potential music cover from something more recent. I’m targeting The Usagi Drop ED right now and already have the chords for it. Quite an enjoyable song to sing as well.

As for art, I don’t know… I might have to start from scratch on the Ritsu I was working on. With such a long gap between the last time I worked on it, I probably won’t have any recollection of the concept I had in mind. I actually had the idea of trying to dabble in doing some webcomics, kinda like the 4 koma style. Had a few concepts in mind but regarding the one I really want to do, let’s just say the references are hard to come by as they all reside in this shoddy memory of mine.

Well, I’m posting this from my phone and the battery is dying so I better publish this for now. More posts incoming once I get to my desktop.